Should you tell your children what’s in your will?

A question often arises whether or not you should tell your children what’s in your will.  This is a difficult question with no easy answer.  You could view it in this way.  Would you tell your children how you vote?  Would you tell your children what’s in your bank account?  So, not all private matters are discussed with your children.  There are advantages and disadvantages to disclosing matters to your children.  The advantage is that you have matters out in the open and everyone knows where they stand and there is no potential for disputes or upsets after you pass away.  The disadvantages are that it can lead to children trying to influence you to change your will to suit their own ends.  Further it can disrupt relations now, where a child thought he or she was being favoured is now excluded from a will; thus giving rise to bitterness or a strain in your relationship during your lifetime.  The other disadvantage is that it can mean that children who are very self centre or self motivated decide that it is not in their interest to maintain relationships in circumstances where there is no financial benefit out of a continuing relationship with a parent.  A final disadvantage is that it can make it difficult to change your will.  Your circumstances might change, your relationship with your beneficiaries might change.  However if changing your will, will result in certain beneficiaries losing out, it might make you more reluctant to make that change.

Every family is different.   Some are very open and discuss all matters all of the time.  Others are more closed preferring to keep matters private.  It is always a personal choice but one which needs to be carefully considered before taking the step of disclosure.

And remember if you have any will drafting queries or would like to make your will email us at info@kerrywills.ie